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Post by kiara louise foxglove on Oct 8, 2010 17:57:20 GMT
 'cause these words are my diary screaming out loud
AND I KNOW THAT YOU'LL USE THEM HOWEVER YOU WANT TO
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •8th October 2010.
My Deepest Secrets...
I've been here a week and I hate it already, the girls are bitches, the guys are complete pricks, and the teachers are overly strict in some classes. No one cares. I mean, I've never really wanted to be the center of attention, but I've never wanted to be completely ignored either. I've got no one to turn to. I miss Ethal. I just wish I had some friends in this awful place. I'm considering things I don't like the sound of at the moment, if you get what I mean.
Bluewater Bay itself is quite a nice place though. It's very warm, though not burning me, because it's autumn now and getting closer to winter as we speak. Ugh... Well I have no idea what I want to write here at the moment... So I guess I'll have to see what happens in life and then I'll have some more stuff to write.
Before I go, I just want to list all the names of the people I miss.
Ethal, Mum, Dad, Phoenix...
What happened to Phoenix?
I mean he couldn't have gone with them...
LOOK WHAT I'VE DONE NOW. I'M THINKING AGAIN.
Ugh, I'm going for serious.
Goodbye secrets.
Ophelia
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Post by kiara louise foxglove on Oct 15, 2010 16:44:18 GMT
 'cause these words are my diary screaming out loud
AND I KNOW THAT YOU'LL USE THEM HOWEVER YOU WANT TO
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •15th October 2010.
My Deepest Secrets...
I've been so tired lately, I'm not entirely sure why. I mean, at my age, I should be full of energy, right? But no, I'm totally exhausted, and it's really starting to get me down. I'm sure I have dark circles appearing under my eyes. It could just be because of how busy I am. School for six or seven hours, an hour to do some homework, and get changed for work, then go to work for a couple of hours, then go home to finish my homework, get something to eat, get ready for tomorrow, then sleep.
Sleep. Sounds so great right now. Thing is, I'm unable to sleep for some reason. Maybe I'm more emotionally damaged than I thought. I wake up every hour or so each night, then it takes me about half an hour to get to sleep again. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Until about six in the morning. Seven if I'm really lucky, or five if I'm unlucky. I wish I knew what to do right now. I have no one to tell, really. Of course, I met Riley, who's a nice guy, really. Stopped me from getting a detention in chemistry. Wonder if he got it cancelled? Anyway, he's a nice guy, but I can't trust anyone yet. It's awful, I know. I've considered getting sleeping pills, but what good will they do? What money can I buy them with? Where can I get them from? I'm totally stuck right now.
Back to the subject of chemistry, the teacher is a total miserable bitch. Everyone apart from Riley, who I sit next to in that class, is a bully, just because I'm the new girl. Or they have something else against me, who knows? I can't look at anyone without seeing them laughing at me. Maybe that's not the case, maybe I'm paranoid.
Well, the only reason I'm writing here's because I have nothing else to do now. This'd be a great time to get an early night, try to recover from this exhaustion. It's only 8pm, but there's nothing wrong with that. This might just help me.
Goodnight secrets.
Ophelia
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Post by kiara louise foxglove on Nov 17, 2010 16:37:06 GMT
 'cause these words are my diary screaming out loud
AND I KNOW THAT YOU'LL USE THEM HOWEVER YOU WANT TO
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •16th November 2010.
My Deepest Secrets...
Sixteen today.. Not sure how I'm supposed to feel about that to be honest. It's just been like any other day, really. I'm not going Bella Swan on y'all, but I didn't tell anyone it was my birthday today. I guess I don't know anyone well enough to talk to them about it, or celebrate with them. I doubt I'll get any presents this year, or even a party. It's kinda tragic, really. My "sweet sixteen" and no one cares or even knows. This is why I wish I had my parents back. I'm sure that if I carry on this way, I'll forget I even have a birthday. I mean, the least I could do today would be to get the money I've saved since I got the waitress job, and spend it on the little things I want, but no. I have to keep that money, since it's more important for me to get an education and survive. I know, no teenager deserves to live this way. It's not natural. I shouldn't be depressed about the anniversary in which my mother put me on this earth... But I can't help it. I have no one to share it with. And now I feel like I'm pitying myself way too much. Great. /Sarcasm.
I guess the only up-side of the day, is that I get the day off work, and then I have only one piece of homework that is incredibly short. I get time to myself, so I'll just take that as my birthday present. I might go to the beach, or the park... Or I might just stay inside and have a movie night. Not entirely sure yet. I might even use a little of the money to order a takeaway. That sounds nice. I might even invite a friend around if I really feel like it. One of my three friends here... That's kinda tragic, too.
On a different note, I got a good level in music, english, science and maths, which I'm proud of because I'm not that great with science and maths. They hate me as much as I hate them, but I guess all this homework and studying is paying off. I got a slightly lower level for geography, but I'm not really bothered about that one. Let's just say I'll never find my own way.. Haha. :x So yeah, school is boring, but I'll just have to get on with it. Besides, it's not far away from the Christmas break any more. Gosh, I'm looking forward to that.
Um, I think that's all, really. Nothing great or exciting has happened really.. Apart from the fact I can't stop thinking about a little someone. Nope. Nothing at all.
Goodbye secrets.
Ophelia
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